Jooster Regency Drabble

[triedunture]

Title: Coxcomb of My Heart
Rated: G
Length: 450

For sweet_fallacy who requested a drabble that involved "In an effort to impress Jeeves, Bertie tries to expand his vocabulary with more colorful words, but gets them dreadfully wrong." Well, there were more specific ideas, too, but I'm afraid this one grabbed me; I do hope that's all right!



Bertie flipped through the book in his hand with a somewhat dubious expression playing about his lips. There were a dashed good number of characters flitting in and out, and they all had names like Sir Lionel Goldenthigh and Lady Lacey Doily Thingummy. Half the time he wasn't sure what anyone was talking about. There appeared to be some sort of disagreement as to who the heroine was to marry, but she tossed her curls in a contemptuous manner and declared her fiery independent spirit.

Bally confusing circs., in Bertie's opinion. But Jeeves relished the things; had nearly a complete set of them. He was constantly explaining to Bertie that it was the language, the playful use of words, and the entertaining sharpness that the era's phrases possessed, that was so captivating. But Bertie was failing to see it, try as he might.

'Sir,' Jeeves's voice floated from the kitchen.

Bertie fumbled in his haste to hide the purloined book of soppy romance. It ended up wedged behind his back, against the chair cushion. Bertie crossed his legs and propped his chin in his hand in a pose of complete innocence, just in time for Jeeves to pass through the kitchen door and into the sitting room.

'Yes, my beloved, erm, coxcomb?' Bertie said, trying out his halting Heyer-speak.

Jeeves drew himself up sharply, but then continued as if nothing unusual had occurred. 'I only wished to inquire, sir, what you would like prepared for dinner.'

'Oh, the meanest, ah, vassal and phaeton-and-four would be welcome, Jeeves.'

Jeeves blinked once. Then coughed into his fist. 'Sir, if I may, have you been reading the Georgette Heyer novels I keep in my quarters?'

'Oh, golly no.' Bertie tried another tack. 'And if I may, Jeeves, you're looking dashed foxed tonight.'

'Sir.'

'Yes, Jeeves?'

'"Foxed" was a term used during the Regency era to denote a person's state of alcoholic excess.'

'Ah. So it doesn't mean one is looking rather cunning, like a fox?'

'No, sir.'

'Not a bit like "foxy," then?'

'Not really, sir.'

'Erm, I didn't mean to say you looked three sheets to the wind, Jeeves. Because you don't, of course. I meant the other bit.'

'Very good, sir.' Jeeves held out his hand.

Bertie produced the Heyer with a sigh.

'Thank you, sir.' Jeeves slipped the book into his suit coat's inner pocket. 'I will prepare a veal cutlet if you have no objection, sir. Dinner will be served in half an hour.'

'Jeeves?'

'Sir?'

'Did I just make a pie out of myself?'

'A cake, sir. If you would excuse me, sir.' And Jeeves flitted out of sight, leaving a chagrined Bertram behind.


fin.

Comments

[sweet-fallacy.livejournal.com]

*laughs* Adorable and delightful! Thank you.

[fanfromfla.livejournal.com]

Perfection!

Frankly, I feel a bit like Bertie when reading Heyer, too!

[cerublu02.livejournal.com]

Awwww. sweet Bertie...close but not quite.

'Yes, my beloved, erm, coxcomb?' Bertie said, trying out his halting Heyer-speak.

Jeeves drew himself up sharply, but then continued as if nothing unusual had occurred.
*giggle* Only Bertie would choose to open with that...and love how Jeeves tries to ignore the unusual-ness.

[willdew.livejournal.com]

At least Jeeves is understanding and knows not to take offense at his Master's malapropisms. And to Bertie's credit, he is trying something new.

Adorable.

[mxdp.livejournal.com]

*IS LAUGHING SO HARD* Delightful! *wipes away happy tears*

[muhsilisk.livejournal.com]

If I had a desk in front of me...
...
*headwallgiggle*

Oh my, this is brilliant *wipes tears away*
I have to read Heyer. Only if the name Sir Lionel Goldenthigh actually exists, though.

[triedunture.livejournal.com]

Sadly, no. Sir Lionel is something I dreamed up, but the names are always very evocative. *g*

[rose-gialle.livejournal.com]

'Very good, sir.' Jeeves held out his hand.

Bertie produced the Heyer with a sigh.

I did LOL at that point *g*.

*snort-grin* There has to be a point where Jeeves can't hold in the laughter any more. Try as he might, somehow, sometime, Bertie's clangers are just going to tickle Jeeves' funnybone that little bit too much, and he's going to crack.

I bally well would.

[muuskanuikkunen.livejournal.com]

Sweet! :--) I love how Bertie tries to be intellectual for Jeeves, its somehow so plausible situation. :D

[stalkerbunny.livejournal.com]

Aaw, poor Bertie. :'D
Adorable ficlet, btw. ♥

[lady529.livejournal.com]

Aw, poor Bertie's just trying to sound smart.. And poor Jeeves is lucky not to have had an aneurysm.

The Lady 529

[random-nexus.livejournal.com]

Adorable! Poor Bertie. He's really trying, the sweetie.

You have given me the dose of daffy smile needed for a Monday morning. Thank you.

[emeraldreeve.livejournal.com]

LOL! Very delightful!